A Nice Guy's Grousings...
It's become increasingly hard for me to remain a nice guy. God knows, I've tried really hard...but they've been making it harder and harder for me to carry on.
And so, everytime I hear girls complaining, bemoaning stuff like "Where have all the nice guys gone to?!", I roll my eyes. Because these are precisely the people making it so hard for me to act 'nice'.
Why'd I start having all these sentiments suddenly, you ask. Picture this.
A guy is having problems in his long term relationship. He gets to know a girl, who is coincidentally also experiencing a rough spot in her relationship. She breaks up, and in spite of the emotional turmoil the guy himself is going through, he cheers her up, brings her for rides, and basically cleans up the mess caused by her break up. She is touched, and tells him that if he were ever single again, to let her know.
The guy breaks up. And the girl initially attempts to get in close to clean up the mess, but the ever nice guy keeps her at arm's length; he doesn't want to use her to forget his ex-gf, thinks she deserves his entire attention rather than to use her as a substitute. And so he tells her to wait for him to entirely get over his ex...it'd only be fair to you, he reasons. The girl accepts his reasoning, and tells him she'd wait. Just don't take too long, she says. The guy's friends tell him he's stupid, but he, believing what he did was right, stuck to his guns.
But then, barely a month later, the girl tells the guy that she's found someone else she likes. She's not waiting anymore. Well, all's fair in love and war, especially since she was single and thus, fair game. And so the guy thrusts aside whatever he may have been thinking and watches as the girl picks another bloke over this guy, and trots off. Throughout the relationship, the guy receives periodic updates from the girl, telling him how dissatisfied she was with her relationship. And he dispenses advice and consolations.
And then, months later, the girl breaks up again. And so, after having her choose another guy over him, this guy has to clean up the mess again, sacrificing his time and energy among other things to go all out to cheer her up, being the nice guy that he is.
And at the end of it all, the girl tells the guy, after he'd tried his utmost to cheer her up, that she felt like going to die. Of all the lost form things to say, after he'd put in so much effort. And so, he switches from the soft tact to the hard tact, trying to get her to get her mind entirely off something as inane as suicide. She thanks him, and tells him not to worry, she'd call him when she was on the ledge. This drives the guy into a partial frenzy; he doesn't dare to switch off his handphone or go to sleep for fear that the girl would call him and he'd miss it only to find out that she'd done something stupid after trying to reach him. Now, after all he'd done for her, does he deserve all this?
And so, he cancels all his appointments on a particular day with his friends when she mentioned she wanted to go somewhere to vent her frustrations...after all, he reasons, a life is more important than anything else. She doesn't reply his messages till late, telling him she suddenly couldn't make it.
The nice guys treat girls as equals, respecting their space and restricting themselves to tentative hugs at most. But somehow, the girls don't recognise all this, and end up giving themselves up to sleazeballs and limey bastards out for a quick shag, only to come running back to the nice guy for comfort, and leave for another player when she was emotionally stable instead. Don't the nice guys deserve something for all the shit they've been getting, all the understanding and respect they've been giving? Is it really, really necessary to turn into a sleazebag as well?
It's becoming increasingly tempting to let go of everything I believe in and switch to the dark side...especially when they are making it so easy, making it seem like the dark side gets everything.
Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.
And so, everytime I hear girls complaining, bemoaning stuff like "Where have all the nice guys gone to?!", I roll my eyes. Because these are precisely the people making it so hard for me to act 'nice'.
Why'd I start having all these sentiments suddenly, you ask. Picture this.
A guy is having problems in his long term relationship. He gets to know a girl, who is coincidentally also experiencing a rough spot in her relationship. She breaks up, and in spite of the emotional turmoil the guy himself is going through, he cheers her up, brings her for rides, and basically cleans up the mess caused by her break up. She is touched, and tells him that if he were ever single again, to let her know.
The guy breaks up. And the girl initially attempts to get in close to clean up the mess, but the ever nice guy keeps her at arm's length; he doesn't want to use her to forget his ex-gf, thinks she deserves his entire attention rather than to use her as a substitute. And so he tells her to wait for him to entirely get over his ex...it'd only be fair to you, he reasons. The girl accepts his reasoning, and tells him she'd wait. Just don't take too long, she says. The guy's friends tell him he's stupid, but he, believing what he did was right, stuck to his guns.
But then, barely a month later, the girl tells the guy that she's found someone else she likes. She's not waiting anymore. Well, all's fair in love and war, especially since she was single and thus, fair game. And so the guy thrusts aside whatever he may have been thinking and watches as the girl picks another bloke over this guy, and trots off. Throughout the relationship, the guy receives periodic updates from the girl, telling him how dissatisfied she was with her relationship. And he dispenses advice and consolations.
And then, months later, the girl breaks up again. And so, after having her choose another guy over him, this guy has to clean up the mess again, sacrificing his time and energy among other things to go all out to cheer her up, being the nice guy that he is.
And at the end of it all, the girl tells the guy, after he'd tried his utmost to cheer her up, that she felt like going to die. Of all the lost form things to say, after he'd put in so much effort. And so, he switches from the soft tact to the hard tact, trying to get her to get her mind entirely off something as inane as suicide. She thanks him, and tells him not to worry, she'd call him when she was on the ledge. This drives the guy into a partial frenzy; he doesn't dare to switch off his handphone or go to sleep for fear that the girl would call him and he'd miss it only to find out that she'd done something stupid after trying to reach him. Now, after all he'd done for her, does he deserve all this?
And so, he cancels all his appointments on a particular day with his friends when she mentioned she wanted to go somewhere to vent her frustrations...after all, he reasons, a life is more important than anything else. She doesn't reply his messages till late, telling him she suddenly couldn't make it.
The nice guys treat girls as equals, respecting their space and restricting themselves to tentative hugs at most. But somehow, the girls don't recognise all this, and end up giving themselves up to sleazeballs and limey bastards out for a quick shag, only to come running back to the nice guy for comfort, and leave for another player when she was emotionally stable instead. Don't the nice guys deserve something for all the shit they've been getting, all the understanding and respect they've been giving? Is it really, really necessary to turn into a sleazebag as well?
It's becoming increasingly tempting to let go of everything I believe in and switch to the dark side...especially when they are making it so easy, making it seem like the dark side gets everything.
Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.
posted by Metalfyre at
8/16/2005 04:00:00 PM
1 Comments:
I like you for what you are. So, don't change.
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