Torn. Asunder.

Looks like you've finally got round to reading this.
And seems like you aren't very happy with what you saw.
I've never told you straight up how I felt so as to spare your feelings.
And you don't like it;lack of communication you say. Trouble isn;t solved, you say.
But when you read my entries, which express my true feelings, and communicates
how I feel, you don't like it either. Hurts your feelings you say. Makes you feel
insecure and scared you say.

I understand. I try my best to. I try my hardest to. But it seems I'm caught between
the devil and the deep blue sea. I'm torn in between. To do, or not to do. I don't know
what you want. As usual.

Disturbing. After 3 years I still cannot fathom what you need. Am I truly the one
who is destined to give you happiness for the rest of your life? How can I, if I don't
even know what you want, so that I can give you what you want, so that I can
make you happy? Which is what I'm supposed to do...which is my role in your
life. God....I feel so bad...
My own girl. And I lack the means to make her happy.

Useless.

Worse than useless.

.

.

.

Went to the Madeira to see the completely renovated apartment. My freaking
gosh it must have been one of the most lavishly furnished and beautiful abodes
I've set my eyes on, not counting those I've seen in the UK.

Normally, when we get a sound system, we just get one, whether good or bad,
and install it, and use it for everything....watching vcds or dvds, singing songs...
Here, there's one BMB system for karaoke...complete with equalisers etc...and
a BOSE system for watching movies.

The whole house is...its like something I might say is my dream house, but would
never dare fantasize about owning. And there it is. Available for me to inhibit if
only I say I want to. The luxuary....vs my place with Dad. Ahh...Again, this old
issue trots by and decides to try and rip me asunder. I will not leave my dad.
But that place is so damn tempting...aiZ...
This really makes me wish nothing had happened, that everything was the way
it used to be. So I didn't have to choose.
I feel like there are 2 kids on either side of me and I'm being tugged simultaneously
by them by my arms.
Decisions and indecisions....

Met PJ's 'sis' Eileen. This really shy girl....sweet n shy. If looks could kill she'd
be a number one killer. When she glared at PJ....ooohhh~ Momma~...save me~!
She thought 'i was a nice guy'...but said it was very 'awkward'...

Talked to Meiyi about her problems. Told her what I'd found out through my
Uncle's experience. Hope it helps.

Missed Kumar's wedding. Not intentional. Got lost in JB. HP no batt.. -_-'
Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

Ludicrous

Woke up as usual at 7am today so I could be on time for the
invigilation at RELC. Reached there at 8:20am but didn't really
wake up till the break ended at 12 noon.

There was this lady from the Netherlands who took the exams
today. Here's a snippet from my encounter with her:

Lady enters examination room with a steaming cup of coffee,
which is expressively prohibitted by the examination authorities;
Only plain water is allowed to minimise any damages (ie to candidate's
time etc). I move to intercept her.

Me: Excuse me, I'm sorry but coffee is not allowed in the examination
room.

Lady: *disbelieving look* Coffee's not allowed?!?

Me: Yes ma'am. It isn't allowed.

Lady: Why? Look at all those people bringing their bottles in...

Me: Ma'am, only plain water is allowed in the examination venue.

Lady: *pissed look* What's wrong with coffee?

Me: Ma'am, we can't give you additional time if you spill your coffee,
and other candidates will be affected by the spillage.

Lady: *disbelieving look* I'm not going to spill my coffee...

**Duh...who buys coffee with the intention of spilling it? She doesn't
seem to understand that accidents do happen...**

Me: Ma'am, I'm really sorry but the examination rules state that coffee
is not allowed in the examination venue. Only water is allowed. I'm
sorry but I cannot allow you to bring your coffee to your seat.

Lady: But there's water in there....

Me: *starting to get frazzled* Well ma'am, the water IS allowed. If you
could seperate the coffee powder and the other ingredients, I'll allow
you to bring the water to your seat.

Lady walks away, gulping down the coffee as she heads for the dustbin.

Heh...sometimes when people are ridiculous the only way is to pay them back
in kind.

Had lunch with Aunt Sophine & Melinda & Uncle John. Wanted to intro them
to the hot plate at Lucky Plaza but...the stall isn't there anymore :(

Headed for JE through a light 'sunshine' shower. Unhealthy.

She got chased out of the library....security guard said she couldn't study there.
Then study where? GeeZ. Brought her for lunch and back to my place so she
can study here...which is what she's doing now.

Dunno if I should go for Kumar's wedding tomorrow...*bueh gian*
Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

Ostrich-cised

The ostrich is blog ready. Helped XL set up his blog and taught him
how to do some minor editing for upkeeping purposes. And so, the finagling
is good to go. There was this description in his blog that I posted, but he didn't like
it and deleted it. Well...to preserve that piece of art for posterity, I'll post it here
where he can't delete it. *nyah*

To hear the voice of ostrich
to know the meaning of
Finagling,

Why 'finagling' you may ask? Well...go to Microsoft Word, type in his name and
do the spell check. The most recommended word is finagling, though God knows
what that means...dictionary wasn't very enlightening.

Go visit it at xianglong83.blogspot.com yeah?

Today didn't exactly start off well. 10 minutes into the 1st lesson, I was suddenly
struck by a stomach ache. I struggled against the delibilating pain to teach, but
by the last 10 minutes, I was in so much discomfort that my legs felt weak...you
know how it goes when you have a stomach ache...it took everything I had to
refrain from rushing out of the classroom to raid the toilet. So for the last 10
minutes, I basically let the class run amok...some of the students were in front
writing their answers on the board like I told them to. Others were doodling...

When the bell rang, I just picked up my stuff and headed straight for the gents.
On the way however, I was acostted by Siew Ling who wished me good luck for
my observation. Dunno if she thought I was rude coz I simply acknowledged with
a curt nod and rushed into the toilet, where the porcelain white throne awaited.

The observation went mostly as planned. Made some last minute changes to the
lesson plan on the advice of my mentor Ms Irene. I got plenty of support from
Siew Ling, Elyn and Jennifer...the latter sent me an email with a lesson plan
attached as guidance..I just didn't use it coz it was too last minute for a change
of template. Got some encouragement from Ray and Eusri as well. Ah well...I
don't know how well or badly I fared. No indication as the principal and Mrs Poh
did an excellent job keeping their faces straight.

Met her today. Spent quality time together and talked till she fell asleep with
her head on my shoulder, which was....dangerously sweet. Ended up oversleeping.
When she woke me up, my brain snapped from the super drowsy, restful deep
sleep state to an entirely alert state...not the usual gradual waking up process we
normally enjoy. Moments later, my vision swam and it felt like my vision was
being constricted from the sides. My brain felt like it was in a vice...had that kinda
feeling in the head you get when you wanna emulate the merlion...but only in the
head. My stomach didn't feel like turning itself inside out.

Sent her to the tuition kid's place. Initially thought I'd be just on time or a few
minutes late since we overslept. But reached there with 15 minutes to spare.
Didn't know I actually went that fast...but I enjoyed the ride as always.

Crystal asked me to be her tutor. But she only wants it on weekends. Dunno if
I wanna sacrifice my rest day to go teach her science or not. Or maybe I'll pass
her to XL.


Hooked dad onto FFX. Yaay...no more frozen orb sounds...
Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

Apprehension

Yet another routine school day. My 3 'sisters' were particularly annoying
today. Think two of them really deserved a smack or something. I got to
talk to them before things get worse. They really put me in a spot. On one
hand, I don't want to punish them. On the other hand, they're asking for it,
and not only is it unfair if I refrain from punishing them, they'll take
advantage and become even worse. And they are starting to get on my
nerves.

Was pleasantly surprised when I heard that more than a few pupils wanted
into my class...seems they enjoyed the 1 week that I took them while the
other teacher was away so much...

My job's apparently in jeopardy. The observation tomorrow by the principal
was viewed as highly irregular by the other teachers; they told me that she
normally didn't bother with contract teachers unless they were either very
bad, or very good. I don't think I fall into the latter category, especially when
her feedback comes mostly from the senior teacher and my last observation
wasn't exactly very pleasing...and I'm told this principal would not hesitate
to sack an incompetent teacher. God knows I've tried my best at this. Now
this...this would be the true test and indicator on whether what I'm doing
now is truly what God wants me to do. But seriously, if I fail and drop out,
I'll be at a loss. Won't know what to do, having dropped out of University
to do this. I'm more than nervous...

She told me last night that she wanted to meet me today. So I put off
collecting my bike from Ah Lian and went home after school at 4 plus.
I messaged her like she requested, but a reply wasn't forthcoming till
something like ten minutes later, when she called.

In her usual ambiguous (or is it ambivalent?) manner, she said she wanted
to meet me. But then at first she didn't know if she could come out or not.
No, she didn't want me to go over either; takes too much effort on my part.
Then, she admits she doesn't feel like coming out. And again, no, she doesn't
want me to come over. The bus stop is so far from my place...the walk will
take a lot of energy and effort. And no, it's going to rain, she doesn't want me
to fetch her. And if I was going to fetch her, we might as well meet at her
place, and no, she doesn't want me to come over. She really wants to meet
me. She misses me. But its late already...so much effort to come over and
meet...and just for a short while only.

Wait. I can predict your reaction. 3 alphabets will be sufficient to express it.

.

.

.

wtf


Well, I haven't got any idea either. And, she's the one who initiated the
meeting in the first place.

When I told her how I felt yesterday, about
the old emotional wounds reopening, she suddenly said she could meet me
from tomorrow all the way thru Wednesday. Even when she originally said
she couldn't meet me tomorrow as she had tuition and even if we did meet
it would be for a short while only. And she didn't mention anything about
meeting on the other days besides Saturday. But at least she does want to
meet me when she senses I'm depressed.

I've told her before about this blog, that I express things here I don't say
to her. That's mostly due to the fact that I've always had this principle
that when it comes to my gal, I'll try my best to let her have her way,
and if I feel I'm in the right, I'll tell her my feelings later when she's cooled
down. But when the later comes, I can't find it within myself to dig out things
that have already been settled. And so I let it rest. And simmer within myself.
And when I get home, I pour it out here. I've told her. But she doesn't seem
interested. In this I am certain, or I'd be expecting a message or call
vehemently denying this and asking that I expunge this little snippet from
my blog. I'm not. Expecting that call that is.

I've come to stop expecting certain things from that department. And I start
to wonder if that would affect the depth of affection I hold towards her. I
truly do not know. There are too many damn things I do not know. There
are SO too many damn things I do not know.

It's so frustrating...
Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

Marker's block

You've heard of writer's block. But what about marker's block?
Frankly, looking at the scripts I have to mark, I don't know whether to laugh,
or to cry. Laugh at the sheer absurdity of some of the storylines, or cry for
the kids who are going to take their PSLE next year.

I'll post one of the stories tomorrow.

I got another observation with the principal this time...oh oh..

The folk of HW1 dua me...say meet at JP and end up flying aeroplane without
informing me. Grrr...


Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

Revisitation

This is the fucking 2nd time I'm blogging this entry.
Just as I'm completing the 1st one my IE crashes.
Lousy school laptops ..!#!@@%%^#$%
This one may not be as good...coz I'm damn frustrated.

Another routine school day for me. Took the oral exams again, but it wasn't that
bad...mainly because I left half way through for my medical review. Was kinda
disappointed at the Yang Zhengling look-a-like...when I asked her if she thought
children should read widely, she said no, which piqued my interest because her
answer differed from everyone else's. But when I asked her why, no response
was forthcoming.

Went for the medical review...the doctor didn't really seem all that interested
and I kinda understand. I'll continue to understand that he feels he has better
things to do until the time come where he screws up my insurance claim. When
that time comes, I'll probably bomb his office. Haah~...kidding.
With all these taut nerves on bombings and terrorists, I better abstein from
jokes on bombings and stuff...

Went back to Mum's place after more than 2 months. Didn't realise how much
I missed that place. And in a month's time, I'll never be able to step into the
house where I grew up in. My mum might think the house holds bad memories
for her, but to me, the sweetest memories of the times where my family was
still together are stored there. As I pace around the house, I can actually make
myself believe that my dad would be coming home from work like so many
years ago, that his 'dear' would reteverbrate through the house as he calls to
my mother. Haiz...after so long, when time should have healed the wounds, I
find I can still get so upset when I think of what I'd lost.

Spent time with my sister. Looking at her, I can't believe that the students I teach
are at the same level as she is. She's so much more childish, and yet more mature
in some ways. Sometimes, I forget I have a sister.

Talked with my mum, who gave me a gloomy prognosis about my relationship.
She confronted issues that up till now, I have been reluctant to address. And
thinking about these issues, I get depressed.

Sorry...I actually typed a lot more regarding these issues, but I've run out of steam
and must stop here...don't know what else to say...can't remember what I said.
Fuckin' errors...argh~!

Met XL for kopi where he let off some steam from his stress at school work.

Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

Caring & Kind

One of the most free days I've experienced...due to the English Composition
Paper, I only had 1 lesson to teach today. Spent most of the time in the staff
room sorting out worksheets for the students to do, and surfing through
the SBF.

Took the oral examination for 5.1 today...here's a sample of what happened:

(Student describing a picture of a girl helping a blind man)

Student: And beside the bus stop there's a girl who is helping a blind man
cross the road/wait for the bus/ up the stairs...etc...

Student: I think...in my opinion...what the girl is doing is very good...

Student: I think...in my opinion...the girl is very...*screws up face in intense
concentration*

**You'd think at this point, if the student was thinking this hard, he/she'd come
up with a good description. Think again.**

Student: I think she's very...*eyes open wide in enlightenment* KIND...
*squints in deep thought again* annnd....

Student: annnd....*ahhh I know*...CARING!

(repeat scenario 20x)

Imagine my dear readers...every student thinks so bloody long and hard...and
ALL come up with the 2 bloody same words...Caring & Kind....now it's ringing
with a tempo like some @#$!$%@#$$ earworm. Gah~
And they're supposed to be from the same class...

Went to collect my dad's bike. Been left in the rain for so long the ignition system
seems iffy...throttle seems a little wooden but the feedback from the fork and shocks
are fantastic. The bike's seriously never felt this smooth before.

I told Ah Lian to do up my bike...will be spending something around $200 there...
and I don't know why I'm doing that if I'm going to be downgrading to an RXZ...

Met PJ again. She told me to order some food...and I ended up eating most of it.
Couldn't finish lor....for one of the very few times I actually leave the table with
food still on it. Brought her to West Coast...then had to rush off to meet Weiquan.
Haiz...after waiting for him for so long, he rides a bike for a few months and then
is about to sell it off. Kaoz...

No fate with biking kakis
Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

Back Track

Friday was pretty much a terrible day. Didn't have the mood to blog.
At all. For the 1st time.

Ms Mary asked me to relieve 6.2 for her at 9 am. And so after my Math
lesson I went up, only to have her come up 10 minutes later to tell me
that I was supposed to relieve at 9:30 am instead. And so, with a mere
20 minutes of my only free period left to go, I rushed down to the
canteen, wolfed down 2 char siew paos...and ran back up with scant
minutes to spare. I arrived at the class just after the bell rang, only to
see the class happily watching 'Scooby Doo the Movie' and the relief
teacher tucked in a cosy corner doing her own thing.

When I waltz to the door and stood there, she gave me that 'one-eyebrow
-raised' quizzical look that said something like '...and what are you doing here?'
And so I waltzed away. In the end it turned out that she'd been waiting for me
to turn up, but didn't know which teacher was going to replace her. And when
I didn't 'show up', she couldn't do certain things she needed settled as a result.
And so I got a roasting from her for nothing. It's not as if I'd deliberately pulled
a no-show; I rushed my meal and zipped up to the class...and all the while
I always had this understanding that it'd be rude for a teacher to barge into a
class while another teacher is teaching, and so when she didn't come out I didn't
go in. And one of the points she grilled me on is that 'I lacked initiative...I should
have gone in to ask etc...'. Ah well...conceptions and misconceptions...

And then I had to go deliver the exam papers to her. And I was thinking a good
riding session would calm me down. And just as I happily open the door with
helmets in hand, I see it start to rain. !$%!#$... so no choice had to dump my
helmets and take public transport. And the best thing is...the rain stopped just
as I arrived at the busstop after walking in the rain. Wtf....and the bus I took
seemed to be at a standstill each time I looked up.

I arrived earlier than expected, and since we'd arranged to meet at the LRT
platform, I thought since I was early I could catch her on her way out of home.
And so I messaged her telling her I was early and whether she wanted to change
the meeting place.

5 minutes, and no response. I assumed she didn't hear her phone and messaged
her a second time, just as her reply came in, saying she didn't want a change of
venue. Moments later, just as I scanned my EZ-Link, she called, and started
shelling me, asking me 'who's the one who's early? huh? where are you? why
don't you come up?', when I'd just arrived and didn't really have the time to
get up there. And so, an already foul mood turned even more sour. I passed her
the notes, and did the most ungentlemanly thing by walking away, stopping only
when she called me. Thing is, I'd rather walk away than flare up at her and risk
hurting her that way. Still, it doesn't excuse what I did...

We made up on the way to her tuition kid's residence, but started off again when
she told me her friend just met with an accident on her Phantom. I asked if her
friend needed help, that I didn't mind going down to assess the bike and tend to
her injuries if need be. And she eventually flared up at me because I kept asking
her to ask her friend and she didn't want to. Gee...it's not really my problem but
I wanna help because she's her friend and this is what I get. She did try to
explain to me via sms later...but I always think preventing the damage in the
first place is better than inflicting the damage and then trying to repair it, which
kinda applied in this case...to me.

Met PJ at West Mall...she thanked me for giving her an excuse to come out, but
she really doesn't know what she did to lift some of that shite off my shoulders.
Ah well...had my haircut finally.

Went to Lynette's chalet yesterday. Held in this really big bungalow. Went early
to cycle but ended up confined in the bungalow thanks to Mr. Rainclouds. Cycled
for an hour before returning to makanZ~!! Lynette had this really pretty friend
who looked a little like Takako Uehara...but attached as expected. Shere as usual
displayed his usual lack of taste...-_-'
Met Meiyi n Gail as well...well no changes in those departments.

Went to church today...and went out with PJ again...surprisingly coz she asked me
out. Took her on her first bike ride to Suntec. When we reached there, the thing she
told me about was sold out...:( after 16 days then she tell me....:(
Sat at Coffee Bean and regaled her with some of my stories...
She surprised me again by giving me a hug after I'd sent her home.

Ah well...tomorrow's the last week of 'real' teaching for the year...
Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

Cheesy Singlish Poem

You ask me if I sian,
But I tell you that I'm gian,
that char bo wanna xian?
Don't, wait you kana pian,
becoz she's veri jian,
her mood will always bian,
altho her eyes fa dian,
she is a real ah lian.
She like to eat la mian,
and then always nian nian,
got money always qian,
her words are very tian.
And then when you bo pian,
she will say 'bu fang bian'.

Yes...by me. Proves how bored I am...
Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

Ladykillers

Say goodbye to MZ the civilian. Say hello to recruit Lee. Today's the day
he shaves his pate.

Went to watch 'Ladykillers'. An adequately amusing show about a band of
robbers whose plans are thwarted by the typical sweet old black lady who
spends most of her afternoons knitting and her Sundays going off to church
and holding tea parties.

The EN125's price has gone up by a hefty $300...from $4.8 to $5.1. Kaoz..
just as everything falls in place to get that bike, the price has to come up.
MZ's suggesting I get a trusty RXZ. I've never felt steady on that bike so
I kinda balk at that idea. But financially it makes sense. I'll get back at least
$300, and the maintainence is only more due to the 2T requirements.

Whereas an EN125 would now set me back by $3.1k. But it's a new bike with
slightly better performances, speaking in terms of maintaining higher speeds
at longer distances. And it doesn't need 2T. Damn...I wouldn't have minded as
much if it were only 2.8k...but that's obvious isn't it...duh!

How how???
Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

Frickin' Govvies...

Those frickin' government types REALLY know how to make your day.
Just imagine. The short distance between my place and the school...and I
can actually get picked up by an ROV officer about my exhaust pipe.
Other Rovvies have previously eyed my bike but have not stopped me.
It's not as if I deliberately went to modify the exhaust; the old one was
damaged in the accident and Ah Lian gave me this one in return.

And so I wasted a good 40 minutes at the inspection center, and I will have
to waste MORE time and money sending the bike for ANOTHER inspection.
Fuck. AND they're going to slap a fine on top of that. Double Fucking CB!!!
I wasn't even speeding or moving at a high enough rev that my exhaust
starts screaming. And that arsehole has the cheek to tell me 'thank you'.
I almost caved in his face at that point of time.

Having been subjected to slavery in that government sector, I know exactly
each and every fucked up way the police and rovvies work. And they stink.
And he confirms it. First, a fine by the parking wardens. Next, a fine by a rovvie.
And previously a fine from TP. Wtf...the government really loves leeching money
from the poor eh? Think about it...who rides bikes that are usually caught for
modifying pipes? The poor people. The rich ones buy cars or superbikes that
can make a run for it. And the lousy CBFs that they use can't catch up. So they
aim the poorer, more economical citizens. Offence offence. Fuck you la...not as if
I'm the one who modified right? Most of the stupid laws regarding motorcycles
don't make sense anyway. Wheelie = failure to exercise full control of the vehicle.
Hello?!? If someone can wheelie and maintain it, it shows he has MORE control
over the vehicle than most others. Self skid while its raining= failure to exercise
full control of the vehicle and careless riding? My dad's the safest rider on the road.
What do you mean careless? Idiots! They stop you from taking corners at low lean
angles, when those are the prescribed safest ways, rather than turning your handle
bar. Gah~! I'm not going to give any of you white hats any face in the future.
ESPECIALLY when I get my R6.

And Daniel has a practical exam today and he didn't know. Had to rush home to
pick him up. Gee~...

And to wrap up my day, she scalded me with a hot iron by accident. Well, at least
she came over today...kinda made up for part of it.

The whole world's topsy turvey~
Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

Sky Captain

Played the role of delivery boy today. Crystal told me she didn't have food to eat,
and when I offered to get her something she scoffed and said I wouldn't dare to.
Hah...what a better trigger to actually get me to do it!
When I arrived, she opened the door and hid behind it.... -_-'
Hello?!? I'm here to see you and you hide here hide there? Haha...~
Chatted with her mum...at first I thought it was her elder sister or something...
looked so young!
Gee~and both mother and daughter thought Daniel was the elder brother. Says
he looks the working age, that he looks more mature and that I look like I'm in
Secondary School.

Sent Daniel to have his guitar fixed at an extorbant $30.....

Watched Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow.......I thought the story was
pretty unimaginative...the mercenaries were actually fighting against robots of
a long dead person. Very classic settings that we haven't seen since the days of
Titanic...and the part where the robots attacked the city like 'Mechs...oohhhhh~
Jude Law was good. Gwenth Paltrow was gorgeous.
A movie you should watch on a weekday.

Lined up in a queue 14 persons deep for passable Nasi Lemak~...
Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

Braving the Tempest

Another routine day at school...with the exception of a visualiser that refused to
work due to a snapped wire. #$%^*&^$@##!!!!!! Is everything in this school
faulty?!?

Dumped piles of homework on the poor kids...2 English worksheets, 3 Maths,
3 Science. They were grumbling...but look at it this way. If they do one per
subject per day, they'd have 3 days to rest.

Went to collect my Shoei today. Was a very big hassle trying to squeeze it on...
almost too small. I almost ripped off my ears trying it. But upon trying it, I've
finally experienced what a full face helmet is supposed to be like.High speeds
without the wind getting into the helmet to create wind resistance and that
annoying roar as the wind whistles past your ears. WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~

I've made her mad again. Very. She couldn't meet me on Tuesday, and so wanted
to meet me today after her tuition at 10. I told her I'd pick her up from the kid's
place. And then, after I'd collected the helmet, Carol asked me to meet up for the
'celebration' at Marina South, (where I achieved new, lower lean angles and higher
cornering speed..yahoo!!!) which I assumed was for the downfall of the small gas.
Turned out to be a birthday party, and I couldn't leave until Gerald arrived so they
could cut the cake. I messaged her then, telling her I'd be late; if she wanted to wait,
she should wait at the MRT station, if not then go home.

I was let down AGAIN by my phone...gee. She didn't receive nuts lorZ. *mumble grumble*
And so she called me, and when she heard that I was still at Marina South, there was this
very palpable rage that washed over me as she grilled my arse good and proper. Now I
know how those live prawns felt as they were being thrown into the steamboat.....
It's just like being in the path of one of the many twisters that have been hitting all over
the globe these few days.

Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

Changing Fads

Remember in the past how we used to purchase countless 'Country rubbers'...
or those little erasers with the country's flag plastered over the front, and then
compete in trying to push your eraser on top of your opponent's eraser to win?
If you were playing 'real', the loser's eraser would be yours. And at the end of
the day, you still could use your eraser for the function it was created for.

But after a brief period of about a decade, this humble game has evolved in the
greatest way that I could never have envisioned, playing 'Country rubber' those
years ago.

Let me guide you through the evolution process the eraser has undergone...

Here's a genuine specimen I seized from an inattentive pupil...

Looks like an ordinary, harmless 'country eraser' at face value eh...

But...never judge a book by its cover...


Tadah...a frankenstein's eraser from Spain...courtesy of primary school students.

What it actually is, if you don't get it, are staples driven into the eraser.
In the center are 2 staples bent in two to form a 'V' shape and stuck
perpendicularly into the eraser.
Why? You'll find out soon enough.


A good, 3-D peek at the 'project'

Look...there are even staples at the sides of the eraser.


And.......
Spinning in action...this is what the kids meant for it to do...

The V-shaped staples are meant to be the axis of this spinning thing...probably
something inspired by those Beyblade nonsense probably...
The staples inserted around the axis are meant to prevent the eraser from stopping
prematurely due to friction between the eraser and the table by preventing the eraser
from coming into contact with the table. Genius eh? If only they directed that creativity
into more productive means...


Watch it in turbo action.


They spin the erasers, hoping they collide, and the one whose eraser ceases to
rotate first is the loser. The engineering is impeccable...when the erasers spin, it
does so on the spot and doesn't move around and eventually fall off the table.

There you are. The transition from simply pushing the eraser to land atop another
eraser...to spinning erasers.
And to top it off, they can't use their erasers when they need them thanks to the
array of staples in the way, and end up having to beg and borrow erasers to
do corrections. -_-'


*********************************************

My observation was disasterous...I was told that if they had scored me I would have
failed terribly. Reason?

#1. Projector wasn't plugged in. Spent the better part of 20 minutes figuring out why
it wouldn't switch on....

#2. The video clip I planned to show them from L'Arc~en~Ciel's 'finale' didn't show up
on the screen...even though though the rest of the Windows Media Player appeared...
In the end, had to have them come forward to watch it on my tiny laptop screen.

#3. Lesson bloopers...like letting pupils leave for toilet breaks as and when they like,
picking a passage they considered too abstract for the students...etc.

*moanzz*


HHAAHAHHAHAHA!! Hippo juz called me to tell me that the small gas has gotten his
just desserts! HAHA! But all the no-evidence stuff was being covered up. Shit. Even so,
3 years of no bonus and 3 days of no pay gives some of the shit he used to dish on me
back to him WHERE IT BELONGS! Hah!
I'm going to celebrate it with everyone tomorrow!!!

Would you believe I taught mandarin yesterday? haha...pri 1...
*Riding hard, fast, AND taking a few corners...

Trepidition

Went to have my Shoei X-9 recushioned today. MZ said I got myself a steal.
$55 for such good workmanship...I can't wait to get my helmet back on Friday.

Had a super long meeting today...from 2-5+pm....zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
Siew Ling's orgainising this gathering involving all the new teachers to the school.
Supposed to be on Thursday but everyone else is busy so its postponed to Friday.

Met Serene & Cheng Ai for my 1st ever Fish & Co. outing...eh eh I NOT ulu k...
just that it had always been out of my budget until now. But anyway it was Serene's
treat. *arigato* I finally got a X-box game...and my 'darling' gave me her birthday
photos and a sweet note :)

Took my class back today...thing is, they didn't cooperate with me up to my expectations
like what they used to do. And the observation is tomorrow! Shit...shit...what if the kids
screw up tomorrow? Argh how?!?!

No mood to blog liaoz...*worry worry worry*
Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

Contingency

At last Mr. Choo is back. But looking at it from where I stand now, I'm only just
beginning to rise to the challenge. Somehow I feel like I'll miss those kids when
I've left the school....

Didn't get to teach my small class though...had to relief 5.5 last minute. They were
pretty bad, but not bad for EM3 students. Managed to control them by showing
a MTV on L'Arc~en~Ciel's 'Spirits Dream Inside'.

Had a student tear up his spelling in front of me. Yes...it's the same kid who asked
me to slap him. Took him aside after school and gave him a good roasting. Turns
out he didn't dare to show his father his spelling results. Keke...I'll probably
accumulate all their dirty linen and use it to keep them in check.

The bunch of chinese girls suddenly started calling me 'tai zi' and asking me to
be their 'brother'. Gee..when I asked, it seems almost everyone in their class
is related to them...cousin la...uncle la...their 'mother' is a boy. -_-'

Bought the Shoei helmet. The cushion stinks like my hamsters' droppings.
Makes me gag even thinking of it...ugh...

Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

On Track

Walked to school today again; the floor was super wet and so I decided against riding.
Felt funny wearing PT Kit after so many days of formal shirt+long pants attire. Well,
I had my fair share of bloopers in my choice of clothing.

Last Thursday I woke up with a terrible tummyache...must have been the food I ate
at the pasir malam from Clementi. And so I holed up in the toilet till it was almost too
late, and then whipped on some clothes and rushed to school. It was only after I arrived
at school when I looked down to see my Fila track shoes instead of my regular riding
boots clump down on the stairs. Later during the lesson, I realised something else when
a student asked me if I was wearing police pants.

I've taken several students to task about their behaviour and stuff. Seems like one on
one talking works wonders. Looks like I'm on track to weeding out little X.A.Ps before
they become fully ensnared. My mission objective. Haha...

Like I said before, out of the 40 pupils in class, only 19 passed their spelling and dictation.
One got a big 0. And the more surprising thing is, Ramadan got a perfect score to get
the highest marks. I can hardly believe it. I do think it's a little strange but if its really
due to his hard work I can't really demean it by accusing him of copying, right?

Sorry about the previous entry being so vulgar...had to let off some steam.
But after all, this IS an outlet for my frustrations, so there.

Enjoyed a leisurely stroll...

Reprieve

The weekends are FINALLY here. What pandemonium. I've listened to the
senior teachers and refrained from smiling in class. I even faked a bad mood
today to get them to listen to me. It worked...for a while.

I had students fighting as usual. Not as much as before, but still there. I had
pupils throwing plasticine at each other. I had pupils ruining others' work. I
had pupils who didn't listen to my instructions and didn't do work. I caught
someone surfing porn at the computer lab. I gave them 4 days to learn their
Spelling & Dictation but only 19/40 pupils passed.

Well...I'm going to hand some serious retribution to those who refused to listen
to me today....5 of them slinked out of class before I'd dismissed them without me
noticing. And there was this kid from another class who called me 'Ah Seah' to my
face. I screwed him good and proper. Cheebye...my family name take and play...
Who does he think he is? I also screwed the porno surfer and threatened to take
him to the police. He cried. At so many moments I felt like raining vulgarities on
some of them to wake up their bloody idea. It'll probably be like that:

Me: Oei!! Who asked you to do that?

Pupil: What? He do me first (etc assorted excuses)

Me: Come here!

Pupil: Whattt?? Not I do one...he do first (etc assorted excuses)

Me: Eh, FUCK you UNDERSTAND?!? I said for you to fucking come here.
Move your feet!!!

Me: Heh...you think this is your grandmother's house ah? For you to do things
your own way izzit? IZZIT? Fucking CHEEBYE!!! *slap*

Pupil: Noo...I never....

Me: SHUDDAP!!! You whelp...I'm not interested in your fucking excuses....

That felt better....ahhhhhhh~

Sorry la...a lot of vulgarities...when I'm pissed the variety of invectives normally
decreases...I end up repeating a lot...

Haah..the weekends are here. Time for a GOOD rest.

Way of the Samurai 2 is cool...haha

Comp's down again, so don't expect regular blogs.

I'm hungry...time to scoot...
Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

Turnabout

Another super busy day. This time, I enjoyed less control over the class.
There was a disagreement that sprouted over accusations of 'someone stole my pen'.
One of the girls cried after being teased repeatedly.
The more rowdy students played with the cupboard.
The boys kept picking on an apparent outcast.
Hmmf~...must show them my power...

I got the X430 today...the ad said it was a lady user, and there were 'light scratches'
on the phone. Well...what to say? The scratches are more than 'light' on the screen; I
don't understand how they managed to get it into such a condition as it's a flip phone...
the screen should be pristine as it is protected. And its a guy lor...who said that the phone
is his 2nd phone. -_-'
Ah well...


I think my post counter is spoilt...it's stuck at 75.
Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

Circumvent

The greatest obstable yet in my teaching career, and I have overcome!

I have OVERCOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have CIRCUMVENTED disaster!!!!!

I rock.

Oh yeah I do...

Busiest day from the day I've started work. Almost had to split myself in two to answer
the questions from all the students.

I'm thinking of trying this alphabet thingy with my students tomorrow. I'll ask them
to form sentences using words that start with a single alphabet. Challenging right?
I hope so...

Thankfully enough God blessed me with the drive and good humour to carry me through
the day. Throat feels dry tho...like never before.

Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

Overwhelmed

Currently overwhelmed at home and at work.
Have to cover for Mr Choo as he's off to invigilate PSLE elsewhere.
From 31 lessons I suddenly have 49 lessons to cover...
minue 8 mother tongue lessons and that makes 41...
Have to settle dad's bike and the household chores.
Trying to tread water to keep my head from going under...
Body aching from yesterday's workout...
Might not have time to blog...

Got my iBead on Sunday...r0x~
Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.

Xboxed

Scammers all! So many of the auctions that I replied to are 'Americans who are currently
on vacation at their wives' parent's place at Romania'. How many Americans have
Romanian wives for that matter? Gee...bloody fucking cheats who don't know how to
earn their dough properly. And don't know when to quit.

And so I can't afford a laptop. Something of an acceptable spec would cost me somewhere
around 2.3k. Whereas an acceptable desktop would only just bust 1k. With a flat screen
monitor. Ah well, I'm out of options. I'll just wait till I really need it next year and see
how things come along.

Got dad's Samsung C-100 from the seller yesterday. Nice chap named Ray who looked
too tired to smile...he said he'd been helping his parents at the market since morning and
was headed back for a snooze. I'm very satisfied with the phone, and so is my dad.
The clarity of the sound really puts my 6220 to shame. Gee~

Got my Xbox yesterday as well. Haha now my house is a gaming paradise!! Thing is,
I'll probably need to get a mod chip installed to continue my ardent support for all
things pirated. And I don't know if that would void my warranty. I'll have to ask the
all-knowing folk in Sim Lim Square about that, and the price. Currently no games
but Serene has so kindly agreed to lend me some should I ask.

Missed church today :(
Not good.
Enjoying public transport, fleeced by a cabbie.

New Police Story

Got a load of things done today. Went over to Ah Lian's to take a look at my dad's ride.
There's light, cosmetic damage but my concerns ran deeper into the slight jerk to the
right that occurs when you apply the brakes that could have caused my dad's
accident. He's going to respray the mudguard, replace the 'Phantom' logo, replace the
dented rear brake lever, do a full service for the engine...something my dad hasn't done
since he purchased the bike 2 years ago, replace the handle bar, steering cone, headlight,
reoil the fork and check on the brake discs, as well as change the chain and sprocket.
All in all should be around $1k. If my dad stops riding I might well sell my bike and
take his for a ka ta.

Went to Sim Lim to get new hard disk drives. Once I'd parked my bike however, I
was approached by this old man in white; at first I thought he was the security
coming to screw me for parking on the pavement, and then I decided he wasn't as he kept
smiling at me...which isn't exactly the behaviour you'd expect from someone coming to shoo you
away. He said he forgot to bring his money and asked me to spare him $3 for lunch, which
I did. One good deed for the day. I got the drives...but I forgot all about the cables. Hopefully
I remember tomorrow when I go get dad's handphone and the X-Box...supposed to go to a
shop called 'South East Asia' to find those in Funan.

I forgot to mention the horrible attitude some car drivers adopt...as if they have more right
to the road just because they pay road tax. On my way around, I was put in the hot seat
by 3 seperate drivers who simply lane changed into me, forcing me to swerve wide to avoid
them when I was originally on the lane beside them. On the 1st two occasions it happened
simultaneously as I was entering the P.I.E. from Toa Payoh. The acceleration lane is a big
roundabout and while I was taking the corner on the inner lane this blue Mazda 6 just cut
towards me, as if forcing me to ride on the curb. Fancy that...lane changing without signalling
or checking blind spots in a corner! I was forced to accelerate ahead, and thus met with
a grey Mazda 323 that did the exact same thing. !@$#!$^@# The 3rd occasion was when
the van ahead of me switched to the left lane then swerved back when he spotted road
works going on at the left lane ahead. Wtf...

Finally got the computer fixed as well...but it's emitting weird sounds and isn't completely
stable yet. I'm not taking the chance of losing my 2nd collection of music just like that!
BACKUP TIME!!

Watched the latest Jackie Chan's New Police Story. Not as much action as I'd expect from
a Mr. Chan production, and the manner in which the 5 gang members were defeated was
some sort of an anti-climax...the entire storyline was building towards a showdown with
the 5, one by one, but 2 of them died in a most pathetic manner. It was good though.
Charlie Yeung makes a comeback in this movie and boy does she look good~!

@!^%@*&@ car drivers...
Riding hard, fast, safely AND taking a few corners.